Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize