Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Randomize
