also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
