So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
Randomize
