Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize
