I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize
