We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize