i just had sex bonerless
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
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