I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
she pinky promised me she was 18
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Randomize
