Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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