It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize
