if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize