i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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