its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
It was a blind-side dick pic.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
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