ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Randomize