D3 body, D1 cock
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
