watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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