You can't motorboat a personality
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
