she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
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