Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
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