You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Terrible idea I love it
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
Randomize
