I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Randomize