3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
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