it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
ok first of all what the fuck
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize