Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Randomize
