Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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