Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
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