Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
this morning i woke up under the kitchen table. i went to my room and there was an inflatable whale in my bed with a banana duct taped to where its penis should be. there were trails of cheez-its around my apartment and i found $67 in the crotch of my underwear. im guessing i had a very happy birthday.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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