U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
