There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
