I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
Nicole vs. Life
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
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