The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Randomize