He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
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