where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Randomize
