OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
I don't want my vagina anymore.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
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