If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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