Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
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