what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
Randomize
