I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
