that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Randomize
