I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
This is classic penis vs brain.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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