Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
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