Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize
