dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Randomize