There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Randomize