So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize