I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize
