He is an equal opportunity slut.
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
