Dual....:-)
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
you inspire me to be a worse person
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
Randomize
