I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Randomize